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How to become the hero of your own life

Imagine that there is no question of having superpowers, or wearing tights with a cape, or having a seven-figure bank account - although that can have a real impact on practical aspects of life: becoming the hero of your own life lies in the trust and the mission that you take for yourself.

How good it is to feel the aura of confidence invade us and allow us to move forward through the obstacles and dangers of life.

Today, I accept full responsibility for my life.

I take credit for my failures and my successes.

I feel like the hero of my future ...

It has not always been so ... because becoming the hero of your own life requires a change of dimension, of projecting yourself far into your future. It's a job that requires a great deal of rigor, patience, and humility. Because it leads you to see the future differently.

So if you are aiming for this scale, ask yourself this question :

Who is the hero of your life ?

Why this question ? Because if you answer, my mother, my father, my best friend or even Batman ...

It is that your expectations towards yourself are not high enough. This means that you put all your success on factors for which you have no leverage.

The only answer to this question is: you, of course.

It may be selfish to say that. But the day I realized that the only lever I was sure I could pull was myself. My life has changed in scope. And it will change for you too, be sure.

Being the hero of your life cannot be improvised. You can't find it on the street, or even buy it.

" Be yourself, the others are already taken ", said Oscar Wilde, inviting us to remember that each of us is unique in our kind! 

By continuing to undergo your life in the same way, you will inevitably come to the point that you are already reaching today. But is this really that " hero " you want to be? 

“ No one knows what the next change will be made of, what unexpected opportunities will suddenly arise, waiting for months or years to transform the course of our lives. Kathleen Norris 

Here I suggest 4 areas of reflection to take charge of your future and guide you. Let the journey begin!

A VISION FOR THE FUTURE

To become the hero you aspire to be, you must have a reason for doing so. You have to keep in mind why you are doing it and why it is important in your life.

The first step is to transport yourself to the future. Your future. Nothing is worse than aimless sailing.

As the author Madeleine Chapsal says: “We will have to dream, because, in order for things to become possible, we must first dream them. " 

Which hero do you want to be? To decide, you have to project yourself into the future. A clear and precise vision of who you are and who you want to be, allows you to know concretely what you need to improve in your life.

The vision therefore determines what you want to do or achieve.

Assign yourself a big challenge

It's easy to tell a person they need a vision. Yes, it's easy to advise anyone - a coworker, a best friend, a client, a sibling - to have a vision. In fact, to start the process, you need a good reason to do so. It takes a susceptible challenge to get you excited, something big, existing, or virtuous.

It sounds simple, and it is, but for most of us, we're reasonable people with limited time ambition. There is no goal like Everest capable of snatching us from the comfort of our soft bed to climb the icy slopes of change and challenge.

Because as Gary Hamel says “for lack of a goal, the only thing that can change the status quo is suffering. " 

Build a cathedral

Long ago, in the Middle Ages, a pilgrim made a long journey to a place of pilgrimage. One day he approached a quarry and saw three workers very focused on their work.

He asked a first worker: "What are you doing, my good man? "

The worker looked up and replied immediately, without much excitement, "I'm cutting a stone, can't you see?" "

The pilgrim then turns to the second worker. " And you, can you tell me what you are doing? " 

“ I, sir, am building a church. "  

At this moment, the pilgrim observes the third worker who has remained behind the exchange and still concentrates his work. Cautiously, he walks up to him and asks:

- What are you doing?

Stopping to strike the stone, the worker stands up and proudly looks at the pilgrim:

- I, sir, am building a cathedral!

This answer warmed the heart of the pilgrim who noticed that, despite his difficult and monotonous work, this worker was happy.

It is the sense of vision we give to our life that fuels motivation and determines what we can expect from it.

Find your way

Once you have determined a clear and precise vision of who you are and what you want to be, you can move towards that goal. This is what the cat makes the heroine of Alice in Wonderland understand.

" - Would you please tell me which way I must take to get out of here?

"Much depends on where you want to go," Cat replied.

- I don't care too much about the place… said Alice

"In that case, it doesn't matter which way you take," said the Cat. "

THE SECRET OF LIFE IS TO HAVE A MISSION, A THING TO GIVE YOU EVERYTHING ... AND THE MOST IMPORTANT, IS THAT IT BE TOTALLY OUT OF REACH.

─ Henry Moore ─

We have to find out who we are, who we want to be, what we love, what we want. This is the most exciting learning we can envision in our life.

Most people are oblivious. They doze off at the wheel, work and think about a shallow standard of living, based only on what they can see. They have no idea what they want.

What has literally transformed my life is the ability to create empowering images for the future. Once a month, I allow myself a period of time between 60 and 90 minutes specially reserved to nurture my goals. This thought process helps me clarify my vision.

This moment is important to me because it allows me to adjust my vision, to refocus and to assess my progress towards what I wish to be or go.

Having a plan and objectives must be nourished by a vision that gives you the horizon line: it is a precise 360 ​​° decor of which you create the smallest details. However, it can be reviewed regularly depending on the evolution of your personal or professional situation or your motivations.

IF IN OUR HEAD WE DON'T KNOW WHERE WE'RE GOING, WE KNOW IT BY ACTING.

─ Nassim Nicholas Taleb ─

DISCOVER THE SPHERE OF ITS POSSIBILITIES

Each of us is born with a sphere of possibilities. One of the problems we face as adults is that we no longer allow ourselves to nurture our sphere of possibilities. Which completely stifles our future potential.

Our skills are many, but we ignore them. They are within us, ready to open up absolutely incredible fields of exploration for us, but we do not even try to venture there. Our mind will always tap into the same patterns which reassure it even if they prove their ineffectiveness.

Not all people have a good knowledge of who they are or of their own skills and talents. Conformity prompts us to choose the security of stability, rather than the dangers of adventure.

Too many people have never tried to accomplish new things in new ways. We are better prepared to be satisfied with an old problem than to find new possibilities.

As journalist Robert Quillen writes, “ All progress comes at risk . You cannot steal second base and keep one foot on first. " 

Aversion to loss

Consider the following:

The important thing is not what a person has or does not have; that's what she's afraid of losing.

The more we have to lose, the more fragile we are. Go higher in life, realize his vision, only works under certain conditions. Thus the fear of losing our achievements, our current situation contributes to domesticate us in the face of adventure and to restrict our current and future possibilities.

As Carole Dweck explains in her book Dare to Succeed: Change Your Mindset, you have to move from a “fixed” mentality to a “development” mentality. If you have a fixed mentality, that you consider "that we are as we are" and that we cannot do much about it, it becomes difficult to seize the opportunities to evolve, to develop. The slightest criticism is unbearable, because, as we are convinced that we are born with start-up capital from which we must make the most of it, this criticism is perceived as an obstacle to our success. We will thus devote our energy to trying to thwart it rather than profiting from it. Conversely, if we have a development mentality, each criticism, each failure, each feedback ”becomes an opportunity to progress and to make our capital grow. We're even going out to criticize so we can do better next time.

Don't let morons reduce your sphere of possibility

In 2005, Steve Jobs gave Stanford graduates the following advice: “Don't let other people's opinions cover your inner voice. "

In his book iWoz, Steve Wozniak explains the secret to success. When asked how he thinks he can change the world, this is what he said:

“First you have to believe in yourself. Never flinch. There are people - I mean the majority of people, pretty much anyone you will ever meet - who think only in black or white. […] Perhaps they do not understand your project because they are unable to imagine it, or because they have already been told what is useful or good and your idea does not fall within this framework. . Don't let these folks undermine your morale. Remember that they are just following the dominant thinking of the moment. They only know what they have already been confronted with. In fact, they have a kind of prejudice that goes totally against the spirit of invention. "

Learn to learn

I realized that if I continued to learn, I allowed myself to open up to other possibilities. But if I stood there ruminating, I was sure it wouldn't happen. Every day, life offers us opportunities to learn, grow and flourish.

Learning is one of the most beneficial activities in our life. Here is what Alexandre Pachulski says in his book Uniques “ Learning is what allows us to get started in life, to indulge in all kinds of activities, to learn from our mistakes, to help others. Learning is both the way, the destination, the ignition key of our vehicle and its fuel, the passport that allows us to cross borders. In short, it is the alpha and omega of our trip! The famous boxer Mohamed Ali summed it up very well: “Whoever has the same vision of the world at 20 as at 50 has lost thirty years of his life.  

The application of this concept allowed me to realize that we must have a “ learning ” mentality if we want to continue to stimulate and motivate ourselves and be able to respond to a demand for almost permanent change. 

There are many new opportunities to grow, learn, succeed and achieve. To grasp them, you have to prepare, anticipate and accept that the world is in perpetual motion.

If you stick to your skills, you close the door to future possibilities. The sphere of possibilities opens up to the continuous learning day after day.

NOTHING COULD BE MORE EMBARRACTING THAN WATCHING SOMETHING DO SOMETHING SAID TO BE IMPOSSIBLE TO DO.

─ Sam Ewing ─

Change is scary. Besides, for most of us, we are afraid to change. Normal, since a person employed for a certain time shows evidence of domestication. The longer a person stays in a company, the more they feel they have a lot to lose if they do not behave like an employable person.

Thus, we are afraid of any change, so unfortunately we hide behind a mask. Consequently, we do not act by being ourselves, but by contributing to a conditioning of our professional environment.

Learning is accepting that the jobs of tomorrow do not exist. The work you do today, when will it be in twenty, thirty years?

Only a learning mentality will allow you to continually update your faculties, capacities, qualities. By practicing and applying the Lifelong Learning Model, you provide endless possibilities for your future.

“ MAN CANNOT DISCOVER NEW OCEANS UNLESS HE HAS THE COURAGE TO LOSE THE SHORELINE. " 

─ André Gide ─

TAKE THE FIRST ACTIONS

You cannot just see your future, I recommend that you codify your vision. For example, after settling on a vision, put it down in writing. Once that's done, you can plan the roadmap to achieve it.

From the moment your vision is clearly identified, you have a starting point and a goal. It is then necessary to define the steps which will be necessary to bring you as close as possible to your vision while taking into account the reality of the environment in which you will operate.

Keep in mind that the extent of your action plan will depend on the ambition of your vision.

From there, you need to make the connection between the present and the future in order to determine a course of action. You have to look at the big picture, be able to break down the end goal into small, easy actions to solve.

Put the goals in perspective to achieve your goal . What to do, what to learn. (For example, your goal is to work outside of France, but you are not bilingual) ? You have to acquire what you lack, through practice or training, through new professional experience. 

It reminds me of this quote from David Thoreau : “ If you have built castles in the clouds, your work is not in vain ; that's where they need to be. Now give them a foundation. "   

In other words, the action plan provides a guide to follow and an agenda to respect, the two pillars of an achievable and not illusory vision.

In general, we spend more time planning our vacations than our professional career. So, I advise you to work this step as if you are preparing your next vacation.

Give yourself a gift: take a sheet of paper. Grab a pen or pencil. And then describe the journey to accomplish your goal. The results will amaze you.

“ A VISION WITHOUT ACTION IS JUST A HALLUCINATION. " 

─ Michael Kami (American expert in strategy) ─

ASK YOURSELF ABOUT YOUR PROGRESS

Occasionally check to see if you are making progress towards your goals. This is the best way to see if you are headed in the right direction.

Ask yourself : " Is what I'm doing getting closer to my goals ?" Am I really moving in the direction that helps me keep my commitments, meet my priorities and achieve my dreams ? "    

Keep your mind focused on what you need to accomplish. Ralph Waldo Emerson, American essayist, philosopher and poet, believed this : “ Concentration is the secret of strength in politics, in war, in commerce and, in short, in the management of all human affairs. "  

Building your success starts with having perfect control over your progress and what remains to be accomplished. You can be excellent, but if your development is not in line with the needs of your goal, failure or abandonment will occur. It is therefore first necessary to ask yourself about the progress of your progress towards your objectives.

To identify them, nothing could be simpler :

List what you did,                    

Then list what you had to do, or suppose you had to do.

“ WHAT YOU IMAGINE IN ADVANCE SO DIFFICULT IS SO EASY WHEN YOU DO IT. " 

─ Robert M Pirsig ─

LAUNCH

The challenge may seem daunting, but take heart! My journey and the result of this journey. Challenge yourself and your achievements, abandon received ideas and raise the bar much higher.

“ WHAT WE IMAGINE IN ADVANCE SO DIFFICULT IS SO EASY WHEN YOU DO IT. " 

─ Robert M Pirsig ─

As written by Dr. Terry Orlick, a world-renowned specialist in sports psychology ; “ Setting daily goals, writing down your focus reminders, and connecting the positives in your path can help you become better and more consistent. But for a strategy to work well, you need to be willing to improve your focus, your performance, or your life. It all starts with your commitment to making those positive changes or advancements. No one can force you to want to evolve or improve; this decision must come from within. After you make that decision and decide to act, persistence does not guarantee that you will achieve your ultimate goal, it does guarantee that you will continue to learn, improve, and develop along the way. Embracing a path gives substance to your life, gives meaning and this even if you do not arrive at a specific distant destination. "   

The path to being the hero of your own life is filled with challenges. The most important steps you can take to become a hero are as follows :

Decide what you really want to do (vision)

Accept that you have the power to do it (Possibility)

Choose to do it (actions)

Accept to question yourself (progress)

4 essential elements that guide the pursuit of personal excellence. These elements combine to make you the hero of your own life.

Setting daily goals, tracking your progress, and connecting the positives in your path can help you become better and more consistent. But for a strategy to work well, you need to be willing to learn every day.

To quote Oliver Wendell: “ The mind of a man, after having undergone an expansion with a view to assimilating new ideas, cannot return to its original dimension. "